![[Love Letters]](Lts_Love.jpg)
LET the heart speak! and the writer will need few suggestions as to the composition of a “love letter.” Such a letter should be based upon the more general forms of letters of friendship, the love of the writer giving tone to the whole. It often happens that lovers are separated during the period of their engagement, and they naturally seek to hold “sweet communion” with each other in letters expressive of their affection.
“Love Letters” are in the strictest sense confidential. No receiver of such has a right to communicate them to others, except, of course, where the advice, sympathy or sanction of proper persons is desired, in respect to an engagement. The man who “tattles” of a lady is a miserable creature, at best. A lady will not be guilty of a similar impropriety toward her future husband. In the event of an engagement being broken off, the return of letters in indispensable, and their retention dishonorable on both sides. Clearly, honor demands that parted lovers receive back every token of their courtship, whether in the shape of correspondence or presents.
It is best to avoid extravagant flattery, lest it disgust the reader, as well as degrade the writer, and create a suspicion of one’s sincerity, which is the death blow of all true love. And while wrong to indulge in strained and artificial expressions of affection, it is equally wrong to suppress those that are prompted by genuine feeling. To a fond and loving heart whose every breath is laden with a prayer for the safety and happiness of the loved one, a loving word is inexpressibly precious, filling the soul with sunshine, and making it for a time oblivious of the pain of separation.
A loving heart naturally imparts its glow to the written page, and this warmth is communicated by the mysterious power of words to the heart of the reader. It is this pleasure that excites the affections and awakens dormant friendships. How the heart beats with expectation in the perusal of a letter from the one we love! How endeared becomes our connection by this spiritual communion, in which our minds with ardent zeal and devotedness become united, and an eloquence and freedom indulged perhaps never more felicitously.
The charm in correspondence arises from the degree of congeniality in tastes, from the impressed individuality and unstudied naturalness of the writer, and from his genuine representations of affection.
A love–letter should be free from all constraint and stiffness. The gentleman should write as he would talk were he in the presence of the object of his affection. A lady’s letter should always be dignified. Even though there may be an engagement existing at the time of writing, it may be severed, or other parties may chance to see the epistles intended for one person’s perusal only. She can rest assured that her betrothed will respect her more for a quiet, affectionate dignity in writing, than if she put too much of the most sacred of all feelings on paper. Good sense will dictate a proper amount of reserve, but when it is necessary to exercise caution in writing a letter, it would be better that the letter were not written; for unless implicit trust is given, there can be no faith in the betrothed.
For the subject of Courtship and Marriage, the reader is referred to [sic] chapter on Home and the Family.
While no rules can govern the writing of love letters, the following forms are offered as models, and may prove of service to the inquirer.
326 ELLIS AVE., Nov. 14,1881.
My Dear Madam:—I am emboldened to lay open to you the present state of my feelings, being so convinced of your good sense and amiable disposition, that I feel assured that you will deal candidly with me in your reply.
Like yourself, I have been deprived of the partner of my earlier life, and, as I approach the middle state of existence, I feel more and more the want of some kindred spirit to share with me whatever years are reserved to me by Providence. My fortune is such as to enable me to support a lady in the manner which I feel to be due to your accomplishments and position, and I sincerely hope that you will think carefully over my proposal; and, if you can make up your mind to share my fortune and affections, I trust that no efforts will be wanting on my part to ensure you the happiness you so well deserve.
I need scarcely say that an early answer, on a matter so much connected with my future happiness, will be a great favor to
Your devoted friend and admirer,
EDWARD H. MALBY.
TO MRS. ANNIE M. SEXTON.
ENGLEWOOD, ILL., Nov 17, 1881.
Dear Sir:—I take the first opportunity of acknowledging the receipt of the flattering letter with which you have favored me. You wish to know whether I am willing to enter again into the marriage state, and in the event of my being so, whether I would be adverse [sic] to admitting you in the quality of a suitor. I assure you, sir, I feel flattered by the latter question, and as to the former, I can only say that I have no dislike to entering again into that state. But our acquaintance is at present imperfect, and we are comparatively strangers to each other’s tastes and tempers. I need scarcely observe that an intimate knowledge of such matters is absolutely requisite, before we can decide whether we are fitted for enjoying together a partnership in life. Meanwhile, I have no objection to allowing such freedom of acquaintance as shall enable us both to arrive at this knowledge, and can therefore only say, in conclusion, that the commencement of your addresses will meet with no obstacle from,
Yours most faithfully,
ANNIE M. SEXTON.
EDWARD H. MALBY, ESQ., Chicago.
ENGLEWOOD, Nov 17, 1881.
Dear Sir:—You give me credit for a discernment I do not possess, for I declare to you, I never suspected that there was anything beyond friendship in the sentiments you entertained toward me. I am sorry to find it otherwise, because it is out of my power to answer your question in the affirmative. I esteem you, but there I must pause. My heart is untouched. The probability is that I shall always remain a widow.
Wishing you, with all my heart, a more favorable response from some worthier object, I continue,
Your sincere friend,
ANNIE M. SEXTON.
EDWARD H. MALBY, ESQ., Chicago.
From a Gentleman to a Lady, Making a Declaration.
NO. 2 CENTER ST., March 26, 1881.
My Dear Miss Hunter:—You cannot but have been aware for some time past that my feelings toward you have been stronger than those of mere friendship. Our long acquaintance has given me ample opportunity to learn the excellences of your character, and to prize them at their full value. It has also afforded you a like opportunity to judge whether I possess those characteristics which you would desire in a husband. Am I presumptuous in hoping that you will consent to become my wife? Until I receive your answer I shall remain
Your anxious but no less ardent admirer,
CHARLES CARTER.
TO MISS ADA HUNTER.
187 PARK AVENUE, March 27, 1881.
My Dear Mr. Carter:—How can I thank you for the honor you have done me in asking me to be your wife? It affords me the deepest satisfaction to assure you that my sentiments toward you are most favorable, and that I shall be both proud and happy to regard you as my future husband.
Yours, most sincerely,
ADA HUNTER.
MR. CHARLES CARTER, No. 2 Center St.
Reply, Stating the Lady’s Engagement to Another.
187 PARK AVENUE, March 27, 1881.
Dear Sir:—While confessing myself honored by the preference avowed for me by one whom I have every reason to respect as a gentleman, I feel that it would be dishonorable in me to keep you in any suspense, when the answer must be unfavorable.
For some time past I have been engaged to a gentleman, from whom I have every reason to expect happiness and comfort. I must, therefore, hope that you will henceforth regard me only in the light of a friend; and, with the sincere wish that such a partner as you deserve may speedily fall to your lot,
Sincerely your friend,
ADA HUNTER.
MR. CHARLES CARTER, No. 2 Center St.
Unfavorable Reply, on the Ground of Poverty.
187 PARK AVENUE, March 27, 1881.
Dear Charles:—To say that I do not feel pleased and flattered at your proposal would be to tell a useless untruth. I feel deeply, almost painfully, the conviction that your kind expressions are dictated by sincerity, and am the more grieved to be compelled to discourage them.
But how are we situated? What hope of happiness with our unsettled prospects, and worse than small means? Industry has doubtless never been, and never will be, wanting on your part; but the want of patronage and capital will ever hold back the efforts of the most strenuous. For my own part, I can do little to make myself [less of?] an incumbrance upon the efforts of one so young as yourself. No, my dear Charles, we must wait for better times, and not entail misery beyond calculation upon others, as well as ourselves, by a too hasty step.
Let us, therefore, continue, as before, friends: and if better times come, it will then be for us to talk about matrimony. Believe me, then, with every good and kindly wish,
Your faithful friend,
ADA HUNTER.
MR. CHARLES CARTER, No. 2 Center St.
From a Gentleman to a Lady who had Rejected his Suit.
NO. 2 CENTER ST., March 29, 1881.
Miss Hunter:—From the highest pinnacle of hope I have sunk to the lowest depths of despair. Your rejection of my passion has filled me with indescribable misery and wretchedness. I now indeed feel myself an isolated being; a lonely wanderer over the face of nature, without one friendly ray of light to guide me on my way. Still, whatever may be my fate, wherever I may abide, one only thought will be ever uppermost in my breast, and that thought will be on your lovely self. I can never cease to love you but with life itself.
May you ever be as happy as I am wretched, shall be the constant prayer of
Your ever attached, though miserable,
CHARLES CARTER.
TO MISS ADA HUNTER.
From an Ardent Lover to a Lady.
NO. 966 WABASH AVE., July 16, 1881.
My Dearest Mary:—I can no longer restrain myself from writing to you, dearest and best of girls, what I have often been on the point of saying to you. I love you so much that I cannot find words in which to express my feelings. I have loved you from the very first day we met, and always shall. Do you blame me because I write so freely? I should be unworthy of you if I did not tell you the whole truth. Oh, Mary, can you love me in return? I am sure I shall not be able to bear it if your answer is unfavorable. I will study your every wish if you will give me the right to do so. May I hope? Send just one kind word to
Your sincere admirer,
CHARLES HARDY.
TO MISS MARY BUCKNER.
219 SIXTEENTH ST., July 17.
Dear Charles: —Thank you for your dear letter. It has made me very happy. My heart has long been yours, as I will own, although you may think less of me for the frank avowal, and I am blushing for myself while I make it. Of course we must consult our parents before making any serious engagement. Meanwhile, believe me,
Sincerely yours,
MARY.
CHARLES HARDY.
From a Lover to a Father on his Attachment to the Daughter.
LAKESIDE, MAY 16, 1881.
Dear Sir: —As I scorn to act in any manner which may bring reproach upon myself and family, and hold clandestine proceedings unbecoming in any man of character, I take the liberty of distinctly avowing my love for your daughter, and humbly request your permission to pay her my addresses, as I flatter myself my family and expectancies will be found not altogether unworthy of your notice. I have some reason to imagine that I am not altogether disagreeable to your daughter; but I assure you honestly, that I have not as yet endeavored to win her affections, for fear it might be repugnant to a father’s will.
I am, sir,
Your most obedient servant,
DAVID C. COOK.
MR. CALEB C. WARD.
NO. 5 MYRTLE AVE., May 18, 1881.
My Dear Sir: —I thank you very much for the manly and honorable way in which you have addressed me in reference to my daughter’s hand. I have long since perceived that your attentions to her were of a marked character, and that they appeared to give her much pleasure. I know no reason whatever to oppose your wishes, and, if I may judge from the manner in which she received the communication from myself, you will find her a by no means unwilling listener.
Dine with us tomorrow at six, if you are not engaged, and you will then have an opportunity of pleading your own cause. Meanwhile, believe me, with every confidence in your integrity and good feeling,
Yours most sincerely,
CALEB C. WARD.
DAVID C. COOK, ESQ.
NO. 5 MYRTLE AVE., May 18, 1881.
Dear Sir: —I make no doubt of the truth of your assertions, relative to yourself, character, and connections; but as I think my daughter too young to enter into such a serious engagement, I request I may hear no more of your passion for the present. In every other respect, I am, sir,
Your most obedient,
CALEB C. WARD.
DAVID C. COOK, ESQ.
HARRISBURG, MARCH 16, 1881.
My Dearest Mary:—If there is one thing which can console me for my unavoidable absence from your side, it is the pleasure of being able to pen a few lines to express, however feebly, my continued and increasing affection for you. It is, indeed, a painful and irksome change from our ramblings about the fields, our evening duets, and our stolen conversations, to a dull routine of mercantile accounts and the never ending confusion of business. Happily, however, my affairs are in a rapid state of settlement, and I shall soon hope once more to bask in the sunshine of my Mary’s [incredibly, he addresses her in the third person!] sweet countenance, and to feed my imagination with thoughts of the happiness which her placid and sincere disposition will hereafter shed around a home! I need hardly say how eagerly I watch for the post, and how I cherish every line that bears the evidence of my dear girl’s affection, and how gratefully every sentiment that flows from her pen is treasured in my memory.
God bless you, dearest Mary, and believe me, with most respectful and affectionate remembrances to your parents, and all friends,
Your ever affectionate and devoted
CHARLES HARDY.
MISS MARY BUCKNER.
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