ARTY in this relation means anything that is not a dinner party, nor a ball, almost any other gathering of people in society may be called a party; the assembly of literary men, lions and fashionables, a conver- sazione, is a party, and you can so describe twenty other social events.

The difficulty would be to find many gatherings for pleasure, in doors or out, besides the two occasions named that may not be so described, that may not come under the general head of “Giving a Party.” The most enjoyable and healthful events of the kind are out-door parties in the abandon of rural life, because they bring color to the cheek, brightness to the eye and renewed courage to the heart. The Conversazione Is one of those delightful entertainments for which we are indebted to the French, who

gave us the name¹ and idea, as well as many of the details. They are occasions for social intercourse, and conversation on matters intellectual, literary, artistic, scientific, historical; indeed on any and everything not in the nature of gossip or disputation. Kettle-Drums², Tea Parties, At Homes, Receptions, may come under this one head, with the great merit that the name describes the event, although of course there may be music, and minor delights without number, for the young people present, who may not care to talk or listen among the elders, all the evening. The rules as to invitations to a ball will apply just as well to parties; and the duties of host and hostess vary very slightly.

The conversazione is usually in honor of some celebrity, traveler, scientist, distinguished foreigner, or other such gentleman, who with any other new comer or stranger must be introduced to other guests,  on their arrival, or as soon after as

convenient. When the guest of the evening sees his opportunity, he will free the hostess or host from attendance upon him, by entering into conversation with other guests, to whom he has been introduced, as he may thus enable the lady of the house to show proper attention to other friends, who have claims for special notice.

The occasion is one of the pleasantest for social intercourse. The lady and gentleman of the house will move freely among their guests, thinking only of their comfort and enjoyment, and having provided for their entertainment all the curiosities, paintings, engravings, rare and curious works and fashionable novelties obtainable for the time; many neighbors who have traveled have collections of bric-a-brac, strange relics, and mementoes, which they will readily loan for a conversazione, although no money could buy them, and by bringing such contributions from many homes together, the show, apart from the intellectual light incidental to a select company, will not fail to make the event memorable.

Dancing will sometimes be introduced at conversaziones, but no rules need be laid down in that respect, as the etiquette of the ball-room will govern. There will be no orchestra, but the hostess will preside at the piano, or provide some competent person to play for the dancers. The entrance to the dwelling will be protected by an awning, so that guests can walk from and to their carriages, under cover, in case of rain. From about nine in the evening to one in the morning the entertainment should run; the lady of the house being ready to receive from about the first hour named, and all the guests should be present not later than ten o'clock. Guests should be selected for distinguishing qualities, talent, heroism, and social position, next to which at such times should rank beauty, amiablity and youth, and the arrangement of the programme will be the test of the qualities of the hostess. The guests are not at liberty to invite any of their fellows to aid the entertainment, but a friend may offer suggestions to the host, or hostess, if he is conversant with the talents of any amateur present. If an invitation to perform is declined there must be no subsequent pressing, and in the absence of other available skill the lady of the house may play or sing, but not often, the purpose being to call out other accomplished people.

Guests should not carry music with them on such occasions, unless they have been asked to play, as the

presence of notes would naturally suggest that they expect an invitation. When a lady has consented to play she should be escorted to the instrument without delay, and the gentleman will procure the music, unless, as is much to be preferred, the player can depend on memory. As soon as the piece is determined on, whether song or instrumentation, the amateur should begin, not heeding the hum of social intercourse, which is the main purpose of tke evening. The charms of music will draw some few listeners toward the piano, and the gentleman in attendance will turn the pages with skill or he may mar the performance-besides holding any articles that the player may put in his charge. After the piece has come to an end the gentleman will escort the lady to the seat she occupied before, and tender his thanks.

Loud conversation is indecorous at all times, but more especially if near the piano, when a lady is singing. It is a mark of good taste to converse in low tones, and to sit at some disance from the instrument, when playing is expected. The player of an accompaniment should make the piano subsidiary to the voice, not strive to drown it by a display of force. The instrument may be defective, and if you are aware of that fact, it may be well for you to excuse yourself from playing, but should you play, avoid disparaging remarks. If a lady, who is about to sing, asks you to sing second, use your discretion, and do your best to oblige if possible, but do not ofer your assistance, nor suggest an invitation.

The rooms in which your entertainment may be given are not to be used for refreshment purposes, beyond an ice cream or such light refection, after your guests have been regaled with ten and coffee in your supper-room. There will be no heavy supper.

Some ladies repeat their entertainments, changing the programme of performere as often as convenient, on certain days of the week, and their “Musical Wednesdays” or other form of hospitality, achieve great social success. A conversazione might be arranged for in the same way at some set day in each week, and the outlay involved might be very moderate, considering the results likely to be achieved socially.

Private Concerts, Theatricals, Charades.

In musical neighborboods there can almost always be found a fair average of talent, competent with training and opportunity to give good concerts. Where such talent does not exist, private concerts must depend on professional skill. Amateur theatricals must depend on amateurs only, although professional aid may be procured for training and rehearsals. Amateurs may be ladies and gentlemen who have given much study to histrionic art, but have not adopted the profession as a means of living. When any such entertainments are given, a supper more or less formal according to means and inclination, should be provided; and refreshments of some kind are socially indispensable.

The private concert may be given in the morning or in the evening,  and of course the morning is afternoon; that is to say,

the time for the concert is from about two o'clock to six, the evening concert ranging from eight to eleven. It is very desirable where anything of this kind is attempted, that the ball-room should be prepared for the event, and fitted so as to define the limits for audience and performers. Conversation, which is permissible where music is the incident, should not be tolerated when the purpose of the evening is a concert. Just as in a concert-room there must be silence while pieces are being presented; so in the drawing-room respectful attention must be the rule, and conversation will find scope between the different numbers. There may be arrangements in the programme for some such desirable change as a brief promenade between the parts, adding much to the enjoyment. The same rule as to attention applies to private theatricals, and although the skill of the players may not be equal to what may be seen on the boards of a first-class theater, their appreciation of the genius of the playwright will be higher, and their motif entitles them to respect. The stage and seats must all be temporary arrangements, and the scenic auxiliaries limited, but imagination in the audience may supply all that is lacking in mechanical effects. Between the acts brief promenades, refreshments and social chat make the evening pass very pleasantly, but when the space is too confined for promenading, ices may be handed to the guests. Loud applause is not the rule in private theatricals, and boisterous condemnation would be esteemed an outrage.

Sometimes the amateur company is purely local, with the host or hostess for stage manager, and in that case the friends of the players will prove indulgent critics. Sometimes the amateurs are members of a society that extends its operations over two or three towns, and in that case the practice and resultant fitness will be greater, so that they will not depend so much on friends. If the company is purely local, the hostess and her friends settle the cast of the piece among them according to understood rules, and every part, however small, should be played for all it is worth. Those who have accepted a part are bound in honor to attend if possible. The endeavor of each player should be to give due emphasis and effect to his or her character in the play, without any attempt to put the other actors in the shade. Host, hostess and guests must work to a common end, and the audience will not fail to applaud with fair discrimination the general result, or individual excellence.

The Tea Party.

The least formal, most friendly and enjoyable of all entertainments given at home is the tea party, and the numbers invited may vary according to the capacity of the establishment, from one to three decades. The imagination of the housewife, with the skill of two or three housemaids, will prepare two rooms for the company, and no more is required for comfort. In one of these the guests will be received and entertained after the manner of a conversazione, but without the parade of preparation then expected; and in the other, tea, with its concomitants, not a sumptuous meal, but elegant

Picnics

might have been considered as the morning variety of the country party, but a distinct head will facilitate reference. Invitations in writing, or by card, may be sent out early, as ladies must have ten days at least for their toilet preparations, and answers should be sent to enable the hostess to provide for her numerous guests without waste or pinching frugality. Carriages may be appointed to rendezvous near some well-known spring, or in any other easily recognized locality, where the host and hostess will be the earliest arrivals, having sent forward a conveyance with the refreshments for the day, under the care of their servants. If any of the guests have no carriages, provision must be made to send them to the place, and in many cases it is found conducive to hilarity to have all the party housed and transported in one large covered vehicle, which is convenient as a refuge during the day, should there be rain, or too fierce sunshine. Sometimes the start is made very early in the morning, and any guest who is not on hand at the hour named should be abandoned to his own devices, in consideration for the others, who have come to time, and for all the arrangements of the picnic. Forms and ceremonies are not the main ideas of such entertainments, but the soul of courtesy will pervade every word and action, to make a good time for everybody.

Servants, except those sent forward with refreshments and retained for the more irksome labors of distribution, removal and return, are de trop in picnic parties. All the pleasant toils of attendance upon the ladies devolve upon the gentlemen, and to them even toil in such service is a delight. Every suggestion is welcomed that brings new pleasures within the reach of the party, but straying from the main body is a selfish procedure. Gentlemen always see to the ladies‘ comfort as their first consideration, and at the close of the entertainment the guests return thanks to their host and hostess for the rich treat their hospitality has afforded.

Parlor Lectures.

The best intellectual amusement that can be provided in any locality, and all things considered one of the least expensive is the parlor lecture. Ladies and gentlemen eminent in the profession, make this description of entertainment their specialty, in Eastern society more especially, and during the proper season for in-door pleasures, the ladies in some fashionable neighborhoods arrange in petite comité⁴ to throw open their parlors, on successive nights, or at intervals when more convenient to accommodate and delight their friends, by bringing them in contact with eminent specialists, who will addrese them in a conversational manner on the subjects given in each programme, and after an hour or more so occupied, receive suggestions for further elucidation, or answer questions asked by the company, with additional illustrations, to make their meaning clear. The ordinary lecture in a crowded hall among people unknown to you, and where there is no opportunity to ascertain precisely what is meant if you do not

grasp the purpose of the speaker, without calling too much attention to yourself, or crowding through the audience to the front after the finish of the exercise, gives no idea of the pleasure and gain attending this elegant form of social gathering.

The lecturer is eminent in the branch of research to which he calls your attention, and his discourse for the evening, not written, but given extemporaneously, though carefully digested, will deal with some question of peculiar interest, not hackneyed by debate.

The parlor or the drawing room, the most handsome and commodious room in the house, is used on the occasion, and without being crowded, is fitted with chairs enough to accommodate all the guests invited. No platform or staging is necessary, as the lecturer does not stand to address his audience. A handsome table with a lamp to facilitate reference to notes, should notes be used, will be the only specialty in the arrangement, and that may be placed in the center or at one end of the parlor, just as may best suit the taste of the lady to whom the entertainment is due. The lecturer will be entertained as one of the guests, with whom he will mingle on terms of social equality during the evening, and there will be no presiding officer, as no occasion can arise for his or her offices.

Sometimes when churches and other institutions have fallen into debt, and ladies, who object to fancy fairs with their attendant lotteries, which are not received with favor among thinking people, wish to lift the embarrassing load, they arrange with eminent parlor lecturers, to given series of their entertainments, in the most attractive parlors or drawing-rooms in the locality, selling cards for the course in advance. On such occasions it is not the custom a issue invitations because the purpose of benevolence would be defeated, and introductions do not become general; but a very pleasant and remunerative course of lectures results in the shrinking or extinguishment of large liabilities. Unlike the bazaar, the labor cast on the ladies is light and the outlay is inconsiderable.

Music is unnecessary as an accompaniment to the parlor lecture, which fills the evening with a pleasure entirely fts own, commencing about eight o'elock and terminating soon after ten. Company will arrive at any time after half-past seven, and those who assemble early are usually on such terms with the hostess, and each other, as to make conversation general, until the lecturer takes his chair at the table. After that time conversation will cease until the lecture has come to an end, when remarks will be addressed to and answered by the specialist engaged for the evening, or course.

The parlor lecture should be given and enjoyed for its own sake, and when that is the case, invitations should be issued by the ladies who have arranged the programme, not less than one week before the time fixed for the first lecture. Each lady will issue her own invitations, and should make them as numerous as the size of her drawing-room, and the claims of her circle of friends, will permit. Refreshments are not provided when parlor lectures are given.

1. In fact, the word conversazione is Italian, not French, and it seems the origin of this type of party is also in late-eighteenth-century Italy.

2. The Oxford English Dictionary defines kettle-drum as “An afternoon tea-party on a large scale. A punning term, implying that the gathering was a smaller affair than the usual ‘drum’ and associating it with the tea-kettle.”  A “drum,” in turn, was “An assembly of fashionable people at a private house, held in the evening;… a rout.”

3. Bon ton: the fashionable world, high society.

4. Petite comité: literally, “small committee”; that is, an exclusive social planning group.